I was trying to be nice but failed.
You see, Rachel hadn't got a nose piercing. What I'd mistaken for a ring, was actually a zit that had dried up and she had tried to - poorly - cover it with makeup.
I've been scratching my head trying to think of a more embarrassing faux pas and the only thing I can think of is asking a female "when she's due?"... when she's not actually expecting at all.
I catch a bus to work on a daily basis and often depending on the time of arrival, I need to stand. In this day of our ever expanding waistlines and where all men and women are not created equal, I for one forgive the men that don't immediately stand up for a female who may, or may not, be pregnant.
Currently sitting pretty at the 17 week mark of my pregnancy, my girlfriend said it best when she told me I "look like I've had a big lunch" rather than pregnant.
This is the reason I wanted to write this post... in defence of men, because I've had to ask - on more than one occasion - "I know I look fat, but I'm actually pregnant, would you mind standing up please?" in order to get a seat.
Their eyes dart (non-perversely) from one female belly to another, the question in their eyes...
Is she or isn't she? Do I offer my seat?
What's the right thing to do here?
Think about it. Would you rather be caught committing the ultimate faux pas, embarrassing yourself and said female on a bus load of people you will most likely see again, or would you rather just be labelled a rude so-and-so for not standing up without being prompted?
It's not just men either. Women do it but I feel there's less of an expectation for them to get up.
So let's go a bit easy on fellow commuters and be a little more assertive in asking for a seat. If they don't get up after you've asked, then you can mutter sweet insulting nothings under your breath but until you've given them a chance to fail, let's play nice.